Equippers Newsletter -- Relationship Reality

What are you teaching your children about what to expect from their relationship within your family? Don’t short-change this question – it is very important. How you posture yourself as a parent – how you teach your children to posture themselves as children, siblings and friends – is vital to whether the genuine love and transformation of Christ can flow through. In fact, it shouldn’t be ‘posturing’ at all, but much of what we self-centered humans do is just that. Chambers taught, “Our Lord is so obviously uncompromising with regard to every human relationship because He knows that every relationship not based on faithfulness to Himself will end in disaster. Our Lord trusted no one, and never placed His faith in people, yet He was never suspicious or bitter.”
Let’s flesh this out a bit. Should we expect our children to trust us? Of course. But will we let them down at times, fail, make wrong decisions, have outbursts? Well, as I like to tell the parents I teach, “I live where you live, and vice-versa” so if you live at my place, you’ll mess up! So can they trust us? In a sense, no, because we’re failed beings, but they can trust the intent of our heart to the extent that we walk with Christ daily. If that is what is coming through – and we show that we are consistently seeking God and striving to serve our children – then His love will outpace our failures.

We must strike a careful, Godly, balance based on complete honesty. We must teach our children that our home is the ‘safe place’ emotionally, spiritually, intellectually and physically, but that the ultimate Protector – the One truly worthy to trust – is God. We must present God as ‘perfect Father,’ and speak to them of Him in that context. We must be humble enough to admit that we make mistakes consistently, but that by His authority they are still under our authority and protection and that He will ultimately cover it all.

I consistently tell my children that -- with regard to discipline decisions, or how we speak, or decisions about what they can and can’t do -- Judy and I expect to be right the overwhelming majority of the time, but that when we’re wrong, they simply get some practice at forgiveness! It’s not a smart-aleck remark – though I say it jokingly sometimes – it’s a serious point.

If we raise our children to see God as ‘Ultimate Father,’ and they see us in vibrant relationship to Him; if we are not too proud to admit mistakes without surrendering leadership, our children will not grow up and use every mistake we made as an excuse for failure, but they will grow up with a realistic view of fallen-but-redeemed man. And we will have served them well.

Other thoughts, links, etc.

• "Depend upon it, God's work, done in God's way, will never lack God's supply." - Hudson Taylor. In the context of this quote, what is it you are doing that simply isn’t working? You either aren’t supposed to be doing that, or you aren’t doing it God’s way. Carefully ask Him which. Don’t make a rash decision, just listen. Parents, Parents, you don’t have time for what He didn’t tell you to do! As I say to my kids 243 times a day, ‘FOCUS.’ (Meanwhile I have answered five e-mails while writing this blog . . .)

• When only He can help, I’m glad (in my spirit, not necessarily in my human nature) because anything less than Him would have been inadequate and would have most likely result in more failure, extended grief/pain/suffering, and a repeating of the cycle designed to draw me back to Him. We humans resist ultimate surrender, but it is the path to ultimate healing and freedom. Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 1 that he felt the sentence of death – I believe he meant that he had just as soon be dead as alive. After all, he stated that sentiment in other places – but that he felt that sentence so that Christ might display His power. Are you scared when you hit rock bottom? That’s human nature. But we have to be willing to be scared, willing to let go, in order to discover the place where takes over. It’s scary-good place, the place of renewal and supernatural power. I’ve talked to several people – including parents of teens – this week who appear to be at ‘rock bottom.’ It is fork-in-the-road time. Pray they will trust God’s strength. And do the same yourself.

• Check out http://www.alvinreid.com/. The second (currently, could be deeper depending on when you read this) blog entry, ‘Suggested Reading for Middle School Students.’ Alvin is a mentor and good friend. Check him out, and give your kids some meaningful reading material.

Are You Looking at Sin or Salvation?

Oswald Chambers taught, “The mystery of sanctification is that all the perfect qualities of Jesus are at my disposal.”

The enemy knowing this full well, he wants to distract us. When we struggle with repetitive sin, we often focus on it. We think, “I MUST STOP THAT. We read books about it. We pray about it. Maybe – probably not, but maybe if desperate enough – we tell our closest Christian friends about our struggle and ask them to pray. But mostly we focus on it – THE THING WE CAN’T STOP DOING.

And yet all the while the “perfect qualities of Jesus” are “at my disposal.”

If you look into darkness, you will begat darkness. If you look into light, you will begat light. We often fail to overcome because we are stupefied by our sin, then repulsed by our selves. Quit looking at your sin and your self!

Look unto Jesus. Think about the fact that He has given power to overcome, ask for this power, and focus on the right action, the good He is doing in and through you – the light!

I remember when I first started driving. Where I looked, the car would drift . . . . isn’t is that way in our walk with Christ? We must look straight ahead, to the straight and narrow path. We must look into light. The enemy wants us looking beyond the guard rails, off road, into danger, especially if it’s a place we are familiar with.

Look at Him. Look at deliverance. Look at hope.

An 'Executive Summary' of What It Means to Live for Christ -- 1 Peter 1

1 Peter 1: 3-16
3 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, 8 whom having not seen F1 you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, 9 receiving the end of your faith--the salvation of your souls.
10 Of this salvation the prophets have inquired and searched carefully, who prophesied of the grace that would come to you, 11 searching what, or what manner of time, the Spirit of Christ who was in them was indicating when He testified beforehand the sufferings of Christ and the glories that would follow. 12 To them it was revealed that, not to themselves, but to us F2 they were ministering the things which now have been reported to you through those who have preached the gospel to you by the Holy Spirit sent from heaven--things which angels desire to look into.
Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; 14 as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; 15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, 16 because it is written, "Be holy, for I am holy."

Preamble
Oswald Chambers writes: “The teachings of Jesus are all out of proportion when compared to our natural way of looking at things, and they come to us initially with astonishing discomfort.”

We should let that help frame our response to today’s teaching.

Framing
1 Peter presents us with a thorough yet concise explanation of how we are to live. It gives us eternal context and specific instruction. In short, this is an ‘executive summary’ of the truth about living for Christ. Let’s look at the key elements of chapter one.

Verses 3-5 remind of what we have – eternal salvation! – and where it came from. That frames everything. We could consider that at length, but I want to focus on the earthly implications for now, since that’s where we all live, though we don’t reside. Friends, if you don’t understand that you’re just ‘visiting here,’ then you are going to make this your home. When you make a place your home, you spend a lot of time fixing it up. Getting it just like you want it. It’s your focus. You want it bigger, better, and more ‘just like you want it.’ If you spend that kind of attention on your earthly comforts, you’ll miss the eternal point, and frankly you won’t be of much use in eternal matters. And as Christians, ALL the matters we deal with on earth are eternal matters, because they deal with relationships, and our purpose is to make disciples of all men, i.e., introduce people to Christ and mature them in Him.

Overarching Point
Larry Crabb writes, “The choice before us is rather stark: either to live to be comfortable (internally and externally, but especially internally), or live to know God. We can’t have it both ways; one choice excludes the other.”

In verse six we are reminded to rejoice over this salvation, and then come the vital words, “though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials.”

“For a little while” -- temporary. Even if earthly ‘permanent,’ ALL discomfort and pain is only a nano-second of eternity, and hwe have eternity with God!

”if need be” – according to God’s grander purposes. And this also would indicate that His purpose is NOT to hurt us, though He is willing that we be hurt (all caused by sin anyway) “if need be”

When you are hurting, and it seems unwarranted, or it seems unfair, or it just hurts! Perhaps you should remember this verse and say, “It must need be”

It is good to stop and consider, ‘Why are we having ‘various trials?’ ‘ First of all, because of ‘original sin,’ i.e., the sin of Adam and Eve has burdened us with a sin nature that has been fully overcome, yet we must ‘work out our salvation’ (which has been granted; this does not mean ‘work for’ salvation) on earth, knowing we have full inheritance in heaven. Life here subjects us to hardships because of sin – not necessarily even our own direct sin, but simply the sin that is present in the world and causes disease, violence, etc. (Of course, we can be in hardship because of direct sin, too). But even this fits into God’s plan as He uses us to exhibit His grace in the midst of hardship.

So we are subject to this for a greater purpose: “that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

Bottom Line
We are tested so that we can show our faith. It’s as simple as that. Hard, yes, but simple.

Key Truth We Must Accept in Order to Deal with the Bottom Line
Overwhelmingly in life, we are saved ‘through’ hardship, not ‘from’ it.

There is a soft Gospel version that is really a non-Gospel that seeks to turn Jesus into our magic genie. American Cultural Christianity has lapsed into this, mostly quite accidentally, some very intentionally. Many automatically think that if something bad happens to them, they must have sinned to cause it, or something is wrong with their walk. Both can be true, but it is well within God’s economy – per many, many Scripture – for neither to be true.

Should we pray for healing? Absolutely. He will do that this side of heaven sometimes – when it fits His will and purpose. Should we pray for a job? Of course. But clearly His purposes are higher than our purposes, and clearly He has purpose in our hardships, not desiring to defeat us, but to reveal us as His to the world, that they might see Him!

Starting at verse 13, “Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; 14 as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; 15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, 16 because it is written, "Be holy, for I am holy."

“Therefore” what? Therefore since you are saved eternally by so great a salvation, requiring the sacrifice of the perfect God/man – so great a salvation that angels desire to look into its mystery – therefore stand firm in trial so that others can see the power of Christ in you and be saved! Therefore stand firm in trial so that you can honor this benevolent God who saved you instead of let you live separated in hell with the one-third of the angels who only wanted to look into being God themselves!

Isn’t that what it comes down to so often in our lives – who is God? You/Me, or Him? So great a salvation requires perseverance in trials, and personally knowing God. Understanding from Scripture and by the Holy Spirit His purpose through hardship, gives us context and power to ‘Be Holy.’